This is a warning to all...If you have remarried and your children mean anything to you...don't leave it to your second or third or whatever number wife to do the right thing!! Or for that matter don't leave it to your beneficiaries to figure it out. It isn't fair to any party even if they all get along and love each other. Death does something to people...it makes some greedy, it makes some depressed or it makes some really mad.
My experience is this: My Dad had an old outdated will which was the only one signed. So, the Wife got the 2 pensions, the house, the SSN, the 401K , everything in the house and the insurance money. He bequeathed some of the family heirlooms to us and a small annuity. So, along with a lot of poor legal advice...we don't even get the few things our Dad left to us except what was in the annuity and mind you that was split 4 ways. Why? Because of GREED, FEAR & SUFFERING.
My Dad could have prevented this by creating a Trust and setting it up so that everything down to how he wanted to be buried and in what were detailed. But, my Dad thought he was going to outlive the Wife...and procrastinated changing his will into a Trust...and believe me, we begged him to...not for a bigger portion or anything...just for peace of mind. But, that isn't how it went. It went that less than 24 hours after my Father died...she got herself a lawyer and we haven't been back to our Dad's home but once...she stole, she lied and cheated her husband's children out of few scraps. In addition, she doesn't want to even pay for his funeral. She want us to pay for all of it plus the small debt my Dad had. And mind you, there is PLENTY of money that my Dad provided for her pay for his funeral expenses.
So, now the children are 1 against 3...it is tearing down our relationship apart, which I might add only gives my Dad's wife much joy. I don't wish this upon anyone...
Protect your children. Spouses come and go but children don't. I know my Dad is watching from above and probably feels really bad that we are going through this pain but he's not here to deal with it. We are.
1 comment:
Wow, how sad and how frustrating and angering. I have many elderly friends in similar mind-sets, putting off the planning, thinking they will live forever - heads in Disneyland. One friend, worth several million in real estate has no will, no trust and two children that already are estranged. A setup for heartache.
I have planned as much as is possible, trust, will, etc. I've always been a proponent of everything equal to children, irregardless of whether they turn out the way I would have wanted or not.
Maybe there is a good thing in this bad thing. Sometimes hard to see initially.
Peggy
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